Do you have to be well mannered to get on in business?

Well, it was another interesting Apprentice programme last night wasn't it? There was some jaw dropping behaviour both inside and outside the boardroom. I will discuss this later. What I have also found interesting is a column by Allison Pearson, who compared our Melody to Margaret Thatcher and other high achieving women leaders. Now I personally cannot see any similarity between the two women, other than having a forceful, focused 'verbal' handbag technique. Allison Pearson also argued that people didn't like Melody because she was a b*tch and that these qualities are admired in men but not women.

As edited by the programme - and of course, we can't be totally sure the editing has been completely balanced, Melody is very good at persuading/bulldozing others into agreeing with her. She doesn't listen to other people's advice or views, and even disregarded the chosen panel of tasters, who 'didn't agree' with her ideas. She just latches onto an idea and goes for it. I admire anyone that has the focus and strength of character to fight for what she wants, but surely it is a fatal flaw to disregard other people's opinion, observations and even panel research. I just can't wait to see this woman in the interview stage...

The other person I wish to discuss this week is Zoe, who was just ghastly, to Melody. She's been ghastly to Susan and Natalie in the past. Of course, the venom directed at Melody isn't totally unjustified;  but the personal attacks 'below the belt' to Melody just before an important presentation (were the buyers from Asda able to hear the performance?) was so unprofessional. Talk about shattering the confidence of your team just before an important presentation. Zoe has the ability to fight dirty: real 'girl fight stuff'. One imagines she would have scratched and pulled hair in fights with any girl she disliked at school. I don't know if she resorts to personal attacks when she feels under pressure; she was much better when she wasn't a team leader - but of course this could have been the editing. It was as though she wasn't capable of making a decision, but would lash out at team members rather than take responsibility. You could see her digging a hole as she attacked Melody and then Tom in the board room, and interestingly enough, the person who was the recipient of previous attacks, Susan, wasn't called back into the board room.

I am going to sound like Karren Brady, who hates women behaving in this way, particularly in the board room. Unfortunately, there is a particular type of male (and Daily Mail readers) who consider that all business women are second rate and behave in the way Zoe does. They don't, believe me! However, her behaviour ticks every stereotype of women as leaders, and unfortunately does no women any favours.

I will therefore go to an article I read where ex-Tesco CEO, Terry Leahy recommended that good manners in business was the key to success. Both Melody and Zoe, and also Jim, do not appear to have this characteristic; one because she plays dirty and makes personal attacks, the other two because they are so focused, they will do anything to get where they want, which will include shouting down others; manipulating and not listening. On the other hand Jim was heard saying that Helen was quiet and gentle and he liked her because he coujld get his way. However, one wonders whether he has underestimated her ability to manipulate him!

I am wondering whether people feel that they have to be the loudest; the most aggressive; the most devious in order to be successful in business. I believe you need a focus, determination, energy and charisma. But loud? Your marketing can be loud, but you could be the quietest person but full of energy and charisma!

It's all in the market research

Now I have some inside information on Market Research; I worked in the industry for nearly two years, and learnt two very important things: you can lead the respondent to answer in a particular way and you need more than 4 respondents. I even knew that from an O Level research exercise. But then again, I don't run a global industry. And I don't have a wealth of awards - although I'm up for the viola player of the year award in our household, which is a given, since I'm the ONLY viola player in the household.

It is also not de rigeur to interpret 'very good' and 'excellent' for, 'not really' and 'okay': unless your French isn't quite as good as you've talked yourself up to be. Or perhaps you just didn't like the product and wanted to ensure it wasn't selected. Or maybe you don't have a good grasp of what consumer's might buy, which is a surprise since you run a global organisation and have been mentored by an impressive list of world class thinkers and Nobel Prize Winners.

Please don't think I'm just getting at Melody. She is a tigress and as Lord S said, she will fight for her place in the Apprentice. She also worked incredibly hard getting appointments, and had a stab at speaking French. However, it was all for her own gain; she isn't a team player and had an inability to hear requests for anything that wouldn't further her own position within the process. She based her decisions on 'gut instinct' without considering any evidence and also conveniently 'forgot' to do some tasks that the team leader asked her to - research on La Redoute for example.

Personally I have a problem with individuals that constantly blow their own trumpet: the 'All talk and no action' brigade. They expect everyone to shine their lights on them; illuminating their talent at the expense of everyone else's. My friend Samantha told me that when she met Rupert Murdoch, he had a charisma and he listened to what everyone said. He really paid attention and made you feel that your opinion was valid. He then went away and considered the evidence (statistical and opinion) before making a decision. He runs a successful global business. That is the skill base you need to be successful Melody. I can't wait to see her in the interviews!

“I can take their hearts, I can take their minds,” The Apprentice

“I can take their hearts, I can take their minds,” he dreamed. Now I apologise for blogging late on this particular episode of The Apprentice, but I had been so mesmerised by Jim's mellifluous tones that I was charmed into thinking he liked me; not that he wanted me to do his thing.

Ah! Of course we know that he told the TV viewers that he had a game plan for manipulating his team into being submissive and if the going got tough, then he'd stick the boot in. As he showed in the board room. As Karren kindly summarised "You have a passive aggressive personality". Anyone that has had a boss like this - or a friend for that matter, knows the outcome is heartbreaking. I am sure Jim's team will also be more wary of his games now.

Yes: this bloke does get everyone to work together, and he makes everyone feel valued. He does the eye contact; open body language - even mimicking body language to develop rapport very, very well. Even the frosty Zoe fell for Jim's charms and was dancing to his tune. 

Yet when the evaluation of the task, in the boardroom, took place, he was first to devalue other's contribution, lying and scraping to save his place. We have all worked with or for people that behave like this. How do they gain promotion? How are they so effective? Perhaps they don't make the progress they like; perhaps the reality is that they aren't telling the truth with future plans and opportunities. I worked with a tenor who was exactly this; terribly destructive to colleagues when the going got tough. Slowly we all unravelled the considerable web of deceit, which took a while to recover from.

If you are in work, it is good to have a mentor or someone that you can trust who might not be in your department. Someone that has one step away from the action but might know the characters. A mentor is invaluable for noticing games and situations that are occurring to warn you, and also to provide advice if the going gets tough.

Jim is, of course TV gold and we are waiting for a withering look from Margaret in the interview session!

The mouse that roared!

How on earth do you get heard when you are in a group of vocal, overconfident, loud fellow contestants?Edna (who was eliminated from The Apprentice last night) said on the TV this morning, that one of the keys to being successful in this format, was to be heard and noticed. Obviously, clever editing prevents us being totally aware of candidate's success, but I was particularly struck by the struggles Susan (my name sake) has been having with other contestants.

There is no doubt that Susan is a clever lady and has a sound grasp of business principles. But for some reason, other candidates are ignoring her, or being unreasonably rude  (Zoe I mean you). Why is she failing to be taken seriously? She does have the disadvantage of being the youngest candidate, and she looks very young. Her voice is very high: there is a lot of evidence to show that higher pitched voices are more difficult to listen to. She is petite in stature and is not yet able to make an impact with her physical presence. Her body language tends to be 'deferential': particularly when aggressive candidates are speaking to her. I do believe that Susan's cultural background also plays a role in her ability to come across: Chinese women are expected to be deferential; they speak quietly and with a high pitch. Susan also does not have the confidence and is in awe (I don't know why) of some of the more experienced candidates. 

So what would I suggest Susan does to be a more successful communicator and for others to take notice of her:  

• Think before she speaks; she is very enthusiastic and desperate to please like a child, but this doesn't go down well.
• Speak in a lower pitch. Not only will it make her appear older, she will be more audible.
• Slow down her speech so it is easier for people to listen to her.
• Speak louder, so that others can hear her.
• Be more forceful when she speaks; she won't come across as aggressive (there are others that are capable of that)
• Stand up straight; head up and confident.
• Don't cower when others shout at her.
• Try not to whinge.

I actually think Susan is a great candidate. She needs to overcome these obstacles to start shining. Lord Sugar has flagged up these challenges for her, and no doubt she has the strength of character to take his comments on board.

Calm down dear: just listen

Oh dear: the swarve Vincent had his red card (or the finger) on Wednesday and his downfall wasn't his ability to engage with people (well Jim) but his inability to engage with female team members. How many times did he dismiss his female team mates' suggestions - or even physically remove telephones from their hands to complete a call?
Engagement isn't just about speaking, but it is also listening. Engagement is a two way process: one that  involves NOT JUST speaking, but listening. A good leader has the ability to do this, and something that I hope Vincent goes away with and contemplates.
I was concerned that he seemed to dismiss the women's contributions to the team efforts. Despite Natalie's good advert, this was not acknowledged - and I can only consider that this was due to a blind spot with women. Misogyny has no place in business, and through misjudging the contribution of a section of a team, it weakens your position.

So Vincent: next time you select a team, or work with an existing team, judge individuals' talents based on their ability not their gender.

Where did you get that hat?

The Apprentice on BBC1, continued to entertain last night with another jaw dropping edition. Of course we have to acknowledge the editors in picking the most amusing scenes from many hours of film. However, from a communication perspective, there are a number of priceless scenes!

• A contestant cold calling a rival hotel's procurement (The Ritz) to ask for a copy of their suppliers' list. Karren's face was a picture. The contestant had no idea about building up a business relationship based on trust: let's face it a cold call: asking for The Ritz's invaluable resource that they'd built up over a number of years. Dur!
• The cloche saga; they didn't even know how to pronounce it, let alone know what it was. Yes: there are cloches that are used for gardening, but surely they could work out that a hotel wouldn't need 'garden' cloches.
• The upward negotiation gag; one contestant started with a low price: each time she negotiated with the vendor, she quoted a higher price. I thought negotiation involved trying to get the lowest price: not the highest!
• The lurking presence of a moustached man, whenever a female was on the phone; he barked orders, so she was having two conversations: with the company and him. He even grabbed the phone, mid-conversation, to complete a call. What a negative advert for anyone that was considering working with him.
• The total lack of time spent assessing the nature of the business; those posh, Mayfair shops are quite intimidating at the best of time: unless you are a young successful business person apparently. They just marched into these shops, expecting to negotiate a 'deal' with a huge sense of entitlement. 'They wouldn't even knock 1p off the price" said one contestant. Why do they have to? The King of Tonga pays full price: if the BBC broadcast a company giving even 1p off, their client base would all be on the phone asking for a refund! I presume no prices were displayed; don't they know the saying that if you need to know the price, you can't afford it?
• The hilarious "I have a very important client" comment by Susan, topped by the vendor's "What's that to me". The apprentices made the mistake of believing that they could get anything for the price they wanted. They had a total sense of entitlement and a disregard for the vendor's costs and overheads. 
• The genuine shock and horror faces, when prices were quoted. OMG was said more than once. My husband told me that you try not to give anything away with your body language and what you say, because it weakens your position with negotiating. Has anyone told Susan that?
• Listening; it appeared that they weren't listening to the vendors but just waiting to quote another price. How not to create rapport in one easy lesson.

If we contrast with the wonderful Irish charmer with the sad eyes. He engaged the vendors, and developed a fast rapport. In the butchers, he managed to get another £10 off and a hug from another vendor. His manner was open, friendly and not arrogant.

I am sure they are very tired (they always get up really early and people have told me they are exhausted), BUT why are these basic mistakes made by, well, some of the most successful young business people in the country. Ha! 

The Apprentice Braggers

I am a great fan of The Apprentice, and certainly I will be blogging and podcasting about this entertaining show in the next few weeks. Yes; I say entertaining, because with good editing and casting, the BBC are able to create a show rather than a basic business programme.

I am always astonished by the 'bragging': the mission statements and straplines some of the contestants utter. I know they will have been interviewed for hours and the producer cleverly picks one off the cuff remark. Perhaps I was brought up to be modest, and this is, of course, in a contest, a problem, but some of the statements from contestants is...well....

One of the most memorable comments is from a female who has been 'taught' by The Dalai Lama and Al Gore and has worked on projects with 12 Nobel Peace Prize winners. And how old is she? I'd love to know which school she went to. Perhaps the truth is slightly embroidered; reading books 'teaches' you about a person's values and thoughts. The trouble is that over inflated boasts often put you into a weak position, since others start to joke about you. It is the case of the shepherd boy who cries 'Wolf' one too many times: no one takes you seriously so when you are truthful, you've already lost their trust.

I know we all have to blow our trumpet, and for individuals that are quieter and more modest by nature, this is more of a challenge, but their needs to be a reality check and a balance. My challenge to you, is to start boasting, and when a trusted colleague or friend starts squealing, or accuses you of arrogance, you will know how far is acceptable!!