My family used to have 'animated' debates with my grandmother over "white lies" - fibs that might prevent someone being offended, and telling the truth. Being a die hard Lancastrian, she believed that telling the truth - or what Southerners would say "being blunt", was more honest. The fact that we had to tell a white lie over her cooking "Oh this is delicious", so as not to offend her, didn't cross her mind!
People DO lie: stinking porkies, white lies or fibs. In business it is very useful to learn how to detect a lie, and also be aware of what you do when you're fibbing. I came across the following article, which could be of use when meeting clients! It gives some self awareness of the types of signals we give to other people when we're fibbing. Of course, when you KNOW what you do, it is easier to disguise this.
Here's the article. Good luck!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/relationships/7324032/How-to-lie-and-not-look-as-though-you-are-lying.html
More information from http://www.executivevoice.co.uk
Tuesday 9 March 2010
Monday 8 March 2010
Complaining online only devalues yourself
In the last couple of days I have come across a number of situations where individuals have tried to undermine a competitor or individual online. Instead of it being a private 'spat' or discussion, this has been played out in the public domain.
1. At a conference I was attending, a potential delegate wasn't happy about one aspect of the arrangements and set up an 'anti conference' twitter account, rather than discuss it with the organiser. Like other people I looked up this individual's tweets, and let's say that I'm surprised she's invited to any network groups, since she has negative tweets on all of them.
2. An exhibition I attended had a derogatory blog written about it. Everything from the timings, to the quality of the exhibitors was mentioned in scathing tones: although the writer had problems writing grammatically correctly. Her expectation was that she would be wined and dined, but she engaged with no one; choosing to sit in a corner tweeting from her blackberry.
3. At a dinner party last week, a friend described how she had discovered an ex colleague had written a song: freely available on the Internet, which destroys her character. Although she is not named, things she said and did are freely quoted in the song. She feels victimised and powerless to stop the song being played.
4. On a wedding website, a supplier was "named and shamed" for "ruining" a bride's wedding. Instead of discussing the alleged mistake directly with the supplier, the bride went straight to the website, complaining without there being an opportunity for the supplier to give his side of the situation. Other brides chipped in, condemning the supplier without knowing the full facts. Eventually the shaken supplier: a small business; came online, giving a completely different view on the situation. It was clear the bride had an unrealistic expectation of what was agreed. However, the suppliers' reputation was affected.
In all cases, damage was caused due to someone going online and 'naming and shaming'. Despite there being one side to the argument, they were making 'noise' online and potentially damaging the reputation of a business or individual. Of course, we all have rivals and competitors, and yes, there are times when we wish to have more of the market ! but believe me, it results in more damage to your own reputation if you make a habit of bad mouthing competitors.
As Julie Meyer said at the BIG Event last week; you never know when you are going to be under. We all know what it is like to be struggling; don't laugh at others for their current situation.
Whenever I see derogatory comments about a business; individual or organisation, I always ask the question: who is this person and why are they doing it. Most of the time it is evident they are envious; struggling or bitter. As professionals we don't want to give that impression - so don't complain on line!!
More information from http://www.executivevoice.co.uk
1. At a conference I was attending, a potential delegate wasn't happy about one aspect of the arrangements and set up an 'anti conference' twitter account, rather than discuss it with the organiser. Like other people I looked up this individual's tweets, and let's say that I'm surprised she's invited to any network groups, since she has negative tweets on all of them.
2. An exhibition I attended had a derogatory blog written about it. Everything from the timings, to the quality of the exhibitors was mentioned in scathing tones: although the writer had problems writing grammatically correctly. Her expectation was that she would be wined and dined, but she engaged with no one; choosing to sit in a corner tweeting from her blackberry.
3. At a dinner party last week, a friend described how she had discovered an ex colleague had written a song: freely available on the Internet, which destroys her character. Although she is not named, things she said and did are freely quoted in the song. She feels victimised and powerless to stop the song being played.
4. On a wedding website, a supplier was "named and shamed" for "ruining" a bride's wedding. Instead of discussing the alleged mistake directly with the supplier, the bride went straight to the website, complaining without there being an opportunity for the supplier to give his side of the situation. Other brides chipped in, condemning the supplier without knowing the full facts. Eventually the shaken supplier: a small business; came online, giving a completely different view on the situation. It was clear the bride had an unrealistic expectation of what was agreed. However, the suppliers' reputation was affected.
In all cases, damage was caused due to someone going online and 'naming and shaming'. Despite there being one side to the argument, they were making 'noise' online and potentially damaging the reputation of a business or individual. Of course, we all have rivals and competitors, and yes, there are times when we wish to have more of the market ! but believe me, it results in more damage to your own reputation if you make a habit of bad mouthing competitors.
As Julie Meyer said at the BIG Event last week; you never know when you are going to be under. We all know what it is like to be struggling; don't laugh at others for their current situation.
Whenever I see derogatory comments about a business; individual or organisation, I always ask the question: who is this person and why are they doing it. Most of the time it is evident they are envious; struggling or bitter. As professionals we don't want to give that impression - so don't complain on line!!
More information from http://www.executivevoice.co.uk
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