Mind where you post an opinion

This week I did something that I've never done before: I posted a message on an online forum. This was in response to Austin being voted off Strictly Come Dancing. My son was distraught at this, and I started a new message stating this. I was astonished at the vitriol that some posters directed at my quite innocent comment. It seemed that for some posters, hiding behind a forum name, making personal attacks on myself and my son were perfectly acceptable, yet these comments were in the public domain. Fortunately I also had a pseudonym to avoid identification, but the hate directed at me by a minority was an eye opener. I should mention that the majority of posts were telling the minority to 'back off'.

Now I have learnt from this: I won't be posting another such message! But it made me think of how we communicate on line, and whether hiding behind a screen (whether it be via email or a forum) results in some people forgetting basic manners and communication styles that are unacceptable in other environments.

I remember receiving an astonishing email from a colleague when I was doing some singing teaching: he would never have spoken to me in that way, yet I had this crazy email. Perhaps as it was written I wasn't able to detect the nuance of what he was saying - although it was pretty blunt to me.

I also received an email from a Women's organisation, asking me to contribute to their website, to promote women's entrepreneurship. I had never met "Sophie" yet she copied me, and 100 other entrepreneurs into the same email, which had very girlie, friendly copy, signing herself 'love and kisses Sophiexx' - and demanding I spent 2 hours writing up something to promote her project. I am sure what she does is valuable, but her presentation, familiarity and style - to ask a stranger to volunteer time, did not engage me to assist her. In fact it did the opposite and I didn't want to be associated with her project.

My message today is to really consider how you use emails - and forums when communicating with others; whether they are good friends or strangers. Consider the best way of communicating which is respectful of the other person - particularly if they are a stranger.